Falling just means getting back up...

   So many times I have read those sometimes "annoying" inspirational and motivational quote pictures, often might I add with a picture that has no remote relevance to the actual quote itself, that say things like… when you fall get back up or she believed she could so she did. Sometimes I just don't believe them… and in the recent that has definitely been the case.

  I started this so excited and motivated and yes my life; a international move, a 52 day leave for my husband, seeing old friends through dinner, even more eating out with my family I hadn't seen in a year took its toll. I started slacking… first it wasn't working out, then it was having more than one cheat meal a week, after that just a total who cares attitude. Oddly I have only gained back five pound three of which I have already lost since regaining a little self control back. But it made me realize… no matter how public I am and how perfect and easy I could try to say this is and will be.. it is not.

  The sentence this is a marathon not a race rings SO true to me now… I have fallen.. and from here I can stay here lose my 30+ lbs of progress or.. I can pick my lazy ass up of the floor again and keep pushing for what I know I really want in my heart. I choose to pick it up and push forward because I am not going to let this defeat me. I am not a quitter.

  Don't ever just roll over and accept defeat, choose to live the life that you see in your dreams.. all those times you tell yourself wow I would love it if my old jeans fit again or when you see that adorable new outfit and say whew I wish I could pull that off… don't talk about it be about it! You most definitely can fit in those old jeans.. you want that outfit buy it then hang it somewhere you can see it everyday and say I will wear you buy this date.

 I also have to say that utilize the people around you to motivate you and if you don't have anyone who does find new friends.. you are who you who you allow into your life. So many of you girls and guys that I either went to High-school with or are fellow military wives, some I haven't even met in person.. you ladies and gents inspire me every.damn.day… I won't name names but I will say a few examples.. mind you these aren't all weight loss related they are pick your life up and change it inspirational as well… to my lady that posts pictures of her food all the time that is often Atkins related who has shed 30+ pounds and is a mother of two you are a bad ass keep pushing. To the mom who works full time, goes to school, supports her husbands career, and who always makes time to crank it out on the treadmill you are amazing. To the awesome guy I've never met but; Once defeated crazy aliens on Gears of War with who has shed so much weight in the last two years man.. you blow my mind, congrats on just completely slaying the tough mudder.

  Keep people in your life who lift you up not bring you down. I just have to keep remembering it's me who decides my future and how I choose to look and feel in it. Get up today look at yourself and say I won't accept defeat or failure...For all the women and even men that hopefully read this.. You can do this. You can make mistakes don't be derailed by a bad day or heck in my case a bad two months… because if you realize that loving yourself is more important than loathing yourself then you sure as hell realize that you are worth it. Changing yourself and lifestyle is no joke.. it's hard; in fact two kids, watching my husband endure two deployments, having two pregnancies the were insanely complicated one almost resulting in my very demise is somehow oddly somedays a walk in the park to deal with versus not eating that glorious Easter Cadbury egg on the counter.. or getting up and moving my body for thirty minutes. But I am just taking it a day at a time and keeping that realization that all things are achievable if I work hard enough to reach them. Good Luck..own today!

Venezia, Ten Minutes, God, and a Large Scale Painting

  Sorry for such a break in posting.. life has been crazy, amazing, beautiful, exciting, bittersweet, and nerve-wrecking all in the last few weeks. So where do I even start…

  Living here.. in this beautiful place with so many differences from the United states I have come to realize many things. A larger love for my country but also it's faults, the real way to live by slowing down and savoring the moment, and that sometimes being emotional and passionate aren't actually bad…being vulnerable doesn't make you weak it makes you strong.

With that said, we recently took our last visit to Venezia and I had so many ah-ha moments… while on a water taxi I was watching multiple couples from all over the world oh and ah over each other in little romantic bubbles; knowing this was and will be a life changing and once in a lifetime event. But how blessed have I been to have lived this for the last three years… How much have a learnt and changed. We have been to countless museums all over the world however for some reason after the water taxi, and the feeling that this amazing blessing is coming to an end to start a new adventure; I realized I had NEVER appreciated the art as much as I did that day in the Gallerie dell' Accademia it just felt so different. I was seeing so many more little details then before.. I for the first ACTUAL time sat down for longer then three minutes and enjoyed the large scale frescos and paintings  I peeped out window sills that still had its original glass and that have been graced with the historical presence of strangers that I will never know but some how felt connected to because in that moment I felt the emotion of raw beauty and admiration for Venezia. On this day I had many amazing moments I will cherish for the rest of my life.. but none struck me like the emotion I felt when I viewed this amazing piece of work… 

Burrasca di Mare (sea storm) by Jacopo Negretti detto Palma II

I can tell you it is not the most beautiful piece of art I have ever seen.. and maybe it is a little off putting because it does not bring out a first impression of beauty, kindness, love, or and other type of warm emotion. It is dark and saddening.. filled with fire, demons, even the men who's very souls are being visually taken from their bodies. The sea creatures are a bit terrifying.. and it's when I see the sea creatures I see him. 

The ONE man determined not to take the easy escape by boat, he is not running, he is there fighting insurmountably facing odds that are obviously so out of his favor it would terrify any other person but him.. which man?? The glorious man bare back riding the large sea creature/fish ready to take his head.. and fight for his life. Notice his soul is steadily inside of him.. there is no questioning, no wavering in his faith in life or God he is ready for whichever way this plays out.. he is there in position to take the head of the evil that is trying to consume him. That man is a badass to put it lamely. How is it that a fictional painted character in a painting that I doubt even .5 percent of the world knows about touch me much more than the famous works of art I have seen else where in Florence, Rome (minus the Pieta.. I cried when I saw her I was so moved), Greece, Barcelona, I could go on. 

Because that one man in this one painting and the spirit of God made me realize in that moment.. to be this very man. To keep enduring and fighting regardless of the many demons trying to change the course of my fate, to be ready sword and courage to chop off the very head of fear itself… to live my life with my faith in myself, God, and those who I choose to spend my time with untouchable.. to remember that my soul is immovable and immeasurable and my doubts can no longer have it... and well I won't be doing these things naked but in my opinion that makes his even more fearless!  

Ten minutes of clearing my mind and being within myself, talking to God, and this painting has forever changed me… If I was a millionaire or remotely rich I would attempt to buy it.. but well then others may not get to experience this pieces emotional rapture. Remember to be this man.. unshaken, fearless, soulful, powerful, present, and unapologetically courageous. Live life as though at any moment a storm could come within your life but regardless of what type natural, spiritual, emotional, etc. you do not care… you will be there to attack it meeting it head first with the tenacity that people only wish they had the strength to possess. 

Private April Challenge Group

Healthy Chocolate Shakeology Peanut Butter Banana Mug Cake

This is hands down my greatest Shakeology creation that I have ever made.. it is SO delish I will be making this all the time! In fact it was so good I only had about three bites... I went to change a diaper and upon coming back my husband had eaten the whole entire thing!! It is very simple and takes less than 5 minutes.

Ingredients:

For Cake:

-2 tablespoons of natural peanut butter

-1/2 of one ripe banana

-2 tablespoons of unsweetened cocoa powder

-1/8 teaspoon of baking soda

-1/2 teaspoon of vanilla extract

-1/8 teaspoon of salt

-2 tablespoons of almond flour

-1/2 cup of vanilla almond milk

-1/2 scoop of vanilla protein powder

For Chocolate Shakeology syrup:

-1/2 scoop of Chocolate Shakeology

-1 teaspoon of PB2 (powdered peanut butter)

-1/4 Vanilla Almond Milk

-1/2 tablespoon of unsweetened cocoa powder

-1 tablespoon of honey

Assembly:

- In a deep mug combine natural peanut butter, banana, 2 tablespoons of cocoa powder, baking soda, vanilla extract, salt, almond flour, 1/2 cup of almond milk, and protein powder.

- Use a whisk and mash banana and peanit butter into small chunks then whisk for about a 30 seconds until everything is well blended.

- Microwave for bout 1 1/2 minutes watching (it can pop over and make a mess, if it starts expanding to high over the mug top stop microwave, wait and continue)

- Get small bowl and combine the following:

- Whisk almond milk, Chocolate Shakeology, cocoa powder, honey, and PB2.

- Remove cup and flip over into a bowl & drizzle with Shakeology chocolate syrup.

-Enjoy

Feedback...

I would like to know.. what would you like to see posted on here? Is there a certain Shakeology recipe or clean eating recipe that you would like to see me try? Or a topic that you would like me to cover? Is there question about Beachbody programs? Or my life, struggles, successes, you would like me to address? Please comment below or write me on the website or Facebook!

Fail until you succeed..

The Super Bowl is on today and it got me to thinking about all of those players.. all those men living such a BIG dream.. how they found great success. How did they get that lucky? Natural born talent.. yea most. Knowing the right people... maybe a few. OR did they practice and work their asses off constantly fail so many times they were bound to succeed.. every. single. one. of. them!

I can't even begin to tell you how many times I've failed then given up on something... How many times have you told yourself well that didn't work out so I give up without the thought of, how can I try it differently so maybe I succeed next time, ever crossing your mind? 

   How many times have you told yourself after success not coming to you instantly so you are done?

   Have you ever let anyone tell you.. Oh you can't do that!! So you don't even try...?

   Or I'm not even going to try this even though I want to because I am terrified to put myself out there            and come out of my comfort zone?

Well if you are failing or have failed but you keep on pushing then you're in damn good company...

NEVER stop trying because the moment you do is when you actually fail... 

Positive Affirmations & Positive Thinking

    There are SO many moments in my life that I have failed, had a terrible time somewhere, or lost out on an amazing life experience all because of my thinking. How I viewed myself and what I can achieve. However I didn't realize that peoples view of me were so DRASTICALLY different from my views because I was so internally negative and self involved. It is almost like I had a complete life block from what my true reality and possibilities were. It had chocked and limited me on actually living my life..

    Looking back on reading positive affirmations or quotes I would criticize them... laugh and say okay there nut case who needs to tell themselves they are beautiful, capable, smart, or worthy?!? The saddest part was that I was so FAR from realizing that I was the person that needed to be telling myself that I was beautiful, capable, smart, and worthy... because I felt like I possessed NONE of those qualities. It took my husband and I having pillow talk one night and me telling him how I felt so down because I felt like I had no direction in where I wanted my life to go, I hated myself and body, that I was a mom but I wasn't living like I would want my kids to live.... I wasn't living like I would want my kids to live!! How is that an example.. my one life calling and job I was failing.

Then something miraculous happened.... instead of telling me some it's going to be okay junk and just appeasing me.. he was actually listening to me...he told me. " Kelsey then change... I believe that you can do anything you want to and I am here." On a side note... my husband is literally the best thing that has EVER come into my life and I am so thankful for him. As he said this I thought here my husband is going through so much yet he had to HELP me get through my "issues". In that moment I knew that I didn't need to know if he or anyone else believed in me.. I needed to believe in me.. the whole time I had been comparing myself or relying on how others valued me without valuing myself... That was the day...

  I knew that it wouldn't be easy to change so much negative into positive over night.. that's not realistic... but I was talking to my friend and huge inspiration in my life, Lindsay, and she gave me some tough love and repeated the EXACT same message I had thought a few days earlier... You can't place your own value on anyone else's perception of you... you have to believe in yourself first. 

   I began wondering how can I start believing in myself... I began googling personal development books... I purchased "The Secret" and "The Purpose Driven Life"... I have read a little bit of each ( I will be reading them cover to cover within the next month or two) and never finished them because I still wasn't receiving the information that was impacting me. Then I began telling myself... look Kelsey you are capable of this, you can do this, and you know who you are and you are BEAUTIFUL! Little did I know those were called affirmations.

    Everyday I gave myself my own inspiration, my own way of admiring myself and it began working. Everyday I felt a little better, I achieved more... until now... today I ask myself what more can I do.. I want to do and be more.. I want to change more lives.. I want to just shed my love onto anyone I meet. I want to live and share this new and beautiful me because more women and people in general should feel this way.

 I have also come to the understanding that because I had so many issues by not telling myself positive affirmations that I had bitterly torn myself apart during some of the most amazing moments of my life... traveling to Greece and Barcelona among other vacations.. I could have made so many amazing connections with people but didn't because I was too scared to reach out. I will NEVER not reach out again.. I enjoy the moment because I love myself!

   So instead of doubting yourself and keeping negativity in your mind.. everyday wake up and tell yourself five positive affirmations... maybe you can't think of five right now.. if you can't start with one... Tell yourself one positive thing about yourself or that you want to accomplish in your life... even if you feel like your faking it... fake it until you make it... do it EVERYDAY! I promise you one day you will wake up and say.. WOW I did it.. I am freaking AMAZING!! I hope you know while you read this... know I love you... I know for a fact I could find AT LEAST five positive things about you or that you have done or do. <3 br="">